How Toxic Mother-Son Relationships Hurt You

There are many different types of mother-son relationships, and not all of them are healthy. In fact, some mother-son relationships can be quite unhealthy and have a negative impact on the son’s life. Here are three types of unhealthy mother-son relationships and how they can affect you.

The overprotecting mother

Mother-Son Relationships

Emotionally absent or indifferent mothers are unable to respond to the needs of their children. They may appear absent-minded and disinterested during interactions, or actively reject any advances from their child. They can continue to treat their adult children in this way.

In some cases, a mother may substitute a relationship with her son for her relationship with her husband. Maybe her husband left her, or maybe he died. Maybe he’s abusing her, or not giving her the emotional support she needs. In this case, it is not impossible for the mother to turn to her son for help. Ashley McIlwain, licensed marriage and family therapist, says, “Parents, your children are no substitute for an unpunctual spouse. Say no. They’re not meant to be manipulated into your personal feel-good piggy bank where you can withdraw money when you’re feeling down.”

Ross Rosenberg, author of “Human Magnet Syndrome: Why We Love People Who Hurt Us,” talks about tangled parent-child relationships. This is where parent and child depend on each other for emotional needs. They look to each other “to make them feel good or whole or healthy, but they do so at the expense of their mental health  their self-concept is defined by another person,” Ross said. Their personalities meet their needs Lost.

I think mother-son relationships often go wrong when there is no father figure. With so many mothers raising their kids alone these days, it’s sure to make a big difference, especially for sons who really benefit from male role models.

I know you’re talking more about the adult son’s relationship with a potentially controlling mother, but I think a lot of the problems stem from childhood.

I haven’t read Slap, but I’ll definitely check it out.

The neglecting mother

Dreaming about people from your past can be incredibly powerful and meaningful. While some dreams may be trying to help you move on from the past, others may be trying to bring up unresolved issues. Here are 6 things that dreaming about people from your past may mean:

  1. You are longing for something from the past – It could mean that you are missing the person or feeling nostalgia for a certain part of your life. This could be a sign that you need to take time to reflect on what you currently have in your life.
  2. You are trying to make sense of unresolved issues – It may be that your subconscious is trying to give you an opportunity to reexamine the past and make sense of any unresolved feelings or issues.
  3. You are seeking closure – The dream could be a representation of your need to make sense of the conflict and move on.

One type of unhealthy mother-son relationship is one in which a son feels that they have to walk on eggshells around their mother. This creates a feeling of anxiety as the son is constantly trying to make sure they do not upset their mother. As a result, the son may become passive-aggressive and withdraw from the

mother, making communication and conflict resolution difficult.

This type of relationship can have an extremely negative impact on the son’s mental health. The son may feel like they are not allowed to express their emotions, which can lead to feelings of isolation and depression. Furthermore, this kind of interaction can cause the son to become overly critical, both of themselves and others, leading to low self-esteem, poor impulse control, and difficulty forming relationships.

This type of relationship can also cause the son to focus too heavily on the expectations of their mother, often to the detriment of their own dreams and aspirations. Without the opportunity to form their own identity, the son may feel insecure and struggle to find their place in the world.

The hostile mother

However, a toxic mother will particularly show one or two traits that we will mention below. And, you will realize that you are not making her abuse you, neither your behavior is bad. Instead, your mother is consciously choosing to treat you that way so that she can feel full and whole.

In a book called ‘The Slap’ by Christos Tsiolkas, we meet Rosie, mother of five-year-old Hugo. Hugo is still being breastfed and when he’s not at his mother’s breast, he is misbehaving without being reprimanded. Rosie has taken her mothering to an extreme that is unhealthy for the child and for her.

Yeah, this may be a bitter pill to swallow. An old proverb states, “A son is a son until he takes a wife. A daughter is a daughter for all of her life.” We’ve seen so many movies where the son takes a woman home for the first time and mama is not pleased. A mother may wonder if this woman is the right choice for him, or there may be certain personality traits or behaviors she doesn’t like. Keep in mind that mother doesn’t always know best in matters of her son’s love life.


Unhealthy mother-son relationships can be damaging to a man’s sense of self and his relationships with others. Whether it’s a smothering bond of too-close affection or an overly critical, controlling relationship, these types of mother-son dynamics can lead to feelings of guilt, resentment, and difficulty in forming meaningful relationships in adulthood.

It is important for mothers to recognize when their behavior is crossing the line into unhealthy territory and for sons to understand how their mothers’ behavior is impacting them. Working together, the two can create a healthier, more balanced relationship.

You can also read here Top 42 Inspirational Charlie Chaplin Quotes



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